The saga continues...

I'm really tired of being a first year teacher. I don't want the implied year-long obligation it intails. I'd like to move right on to being simply a teacher. But not by name. It irks me to be called "teacher"...that behavior must be squelched quickly. It's Ms. Sarah. Not because I really want to be "Ms" Sarah...just plain "Sarah" is fine by me, but oh well.

I've been told by multiple people from the district office that the mess I am cleaning up at my school is atypical. That first year teachers don't usually have to jump through so many hoops. That I am doing a good job. That I'm good at writing IEPs. I am failing to find comfort in those words. I hate being made to feel incompetant. I hate having to ask constant questions so as not to make a mistake whilst under the microscope. And each time getting different answers from the same in-charge people. I don't do well with situations that promote paranoia. I didn't create the mess, but I am afraid that somewhere along the line someone might forget that and blame me for not fixing things well enough fast enough. I'm not a miracle worker. That was the woman who worked with Hellen Keller...Annie whats-her-face. I am just Sarah. I just want to teach.